1. Two words: swine flu.

 
2. Suddenly develop ADD. Ritalin is a great appetite suppressant.

 
3. Have your mouth wired shut. You may be mistaken for Hannibal Lector, but you will be way too skinny for someone to throw you in the back of their van and use you for a skin suit.

 
4. A well placed tapeworm can do wonders.

 
5. Wrap yourself in saran wrap and hit the sauna. Come out only when you feel you are in danger of being laminated.

 
6. Liquid diet. Champagne, beer and wine are all fine. You can make your martinis with chicken garnishes if you feel like you need a little extra protein.

 
7. Sex. Lots of sex. You can burn several hundred calories per hour having sex. Of course the more varied the positions the better, missionary will not burn as many calories as some other more creative positions such as The Hoover which also has the added benefit of strengthening your triceps.

 
8. Use correctol as ice cream toppings instead of sprinkles. Just make sure you block out several hours of bathroom time the next morning.

 
9. Go on a hunger fast. People will think you’ve got a great social conscience, and never know that you are doing it to show up your best friend on your weekend beach trip.

 
10. Give up. Admit that 10 lbs is a small price to pay for the enjoyment of french fries dipped in ranch dressing.  Eat them with relish in front of your undernourished counterparts.